When I found out I was “with child”, one of the first things I did was download a top-rated baby info book on my Kindle. I know nothing about babies, people. I gotta school myself before this life-form arrives and I can’t put it away or stall any longer.
So I of course devour The Mayo Clinic’s Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy. I mow through What to Expect when you’re Expecting. When my literature is exhausted I move to iPhone apps. And let me tell you the one thing that every single one of these informational hubs have in common.
Baby’s growth is always correlated to a fruit.
Limes. Navel Oranges. Avocados. Grapes. Grapefruits. Bananas. Cumquats?
Every week, Baby Dub graduates to a new fruit. At the official 15 week mark, Baby Dub is the size of either an Avocado, a Navel Orange, or an Apple. I have apples in my house right now, and I’m wondering, are we talking Granny Smith size, or these epic biologically altered Jonagolds that are the size of my head? Because if it is the latter, I’m feeling a little better about the current level of protruding my belly is doing.
So what’s the deal with the fruit comparisons? Are the docs trying to get me thinking about healthy snacks? Because when I start to think of Baby Dub as a little apple in my tummy, it doesn’t really make me want to reach for that Jonagold.
I’ll probably stick to these lemon bars.