Questions people ask you when you’re pregnant

Any weird cravings?

What’s your due date?

How are you feeling?

Do you have baby names picked out?

Do you care if it is a boy or a girl?

People! Enough with the grill-session here. I feel like I’m one of those Ford “surprise press conference” commercials sometimes.

Just kidding. I love it when people ask questions about this pregnancy. I love talking about it, because it makes things feel more real. I have to admit, its starting to feel REALLY real now that I have a legit bump to showcase, and now that I am starting to notice Baby Dub rocking around in there a bit.

I do feel sorry for my husband, who by now has heard my schtick for just about every question I get asked.

Interviewer: How are you feeling?

Schticky response 1: I feel amazing! Honestly for the first trimester, being pregnant just felt like an extended case of gassiness.

Schticky response 2: I feel amazing! I had a “chunk-free” first trimester, knock on wood.

Schticky response 3; I feel amazing! If it weren’t for these huge knockers, I probably wouldn’t even notice being pregnant.

Interviewer: Any weird cravings?

Schticky response 1: Not really. I ALWAYS want ice cream… but that’s not weird.

Schticky response 2: Not yet. So far I haven’t tried to eat a jar of pennies or a cup of laundry detergent, so I think we’re safe.**

Interviewer: What’s your due date?

Schticky response: The 4th of July! We’ll be giving up our independence on the day that we celebrate it!

Ba-DOOM-chhhhhhh 

People who know me know that I like to talk. And everybody likes to talk about themselves (admit it). And I like to talk about myself especially when it is entertaining to other people. Being pregnant is like a whole 9 month adventure of new material. I just hope that it is entertaining to somebody other than myself.

If you’ve been around me and heard some of my pregnancy schtick, please don’t call me out for using the same lines over and over a la Shooter McGavin (“This guy’s in the sand more than David Hasselhoff!”). I’ll try to keep it fresh here on the blog. It’s a lot harder to recycle material in written format.

And if I do recycle material, then I blame Baby Brain.

I can’t wait to play that card. It’s one I’ve been saving.

** This is a real condition that afflicts some women called pica. If you want to chow down on non-food items like clay or bleach, my pregnancy books/apps/etc. all say don’t give in to these cravings. Just in case common sense goes out the door.

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3 thoughts on “Questions people ask you when you’re pregnant

  1. Auntie Dub says:

    We love your schtick! Just so long as you don’t start making your grand entrance into a room a la The Rock style: “Can you SMELL what Mama Dub’s cooking?!??

  2. tina says:

    Is it weird that when I read about ‘pica’ just now I imagined biting into clay and it sounded kind of nice? (yes, it’s weird. Duh. please don’t tell anyone how weird I am)

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