The Honeymoon of Pregnancy

Whoever called the 2nd trimester the “honeymoon” of pregnancy can suck it.

I felt WAY better in the 1st trimester.

I wasn’t sick. I didn’t have trouble sleeping. I wasn’t overly exhausted. I wasn’t carrying extra poundage all over. My back didn’t hurt and I could still wear most of my bras.

I AM fond of my belly. It is fully of Baby, and Baby is good.

But I have to say that the 2nd trimester has not been a honeymoon, by any stretch of the imagination.

On our honeymoon, for instance, it was about 100 degrees outside and I got to bask in the sunshine every day. There was golf, every day, and I didn’t have to swing around a belly. I was in some of the best shape of my life (P90X got me ready for the big day!). I had a wardrobe that wasn’t solely made up of stretchy fabrics. The only reason for my back aching was too much time in the bunkers at PGA West.

Dangit, I got to drink cocktails on my honeymoon!

They call it the “honeymoon of pregnancy” because you typically aren’t throwing up every 5 minutes (in contrast to the 1st trimester, I suppose), and you aren’t as huge as you’re going to get in the 3rd trimester, so in theory this is the most comfortable you’ll be in pregnancy.

Unless you were awesome in the 1st trimester, like me.

A friend of mine (who found out recently that she is pregnant) texted me this weekend to ask me how much weight I gained in the 1st trimester.

Without shame I will tell you, as I told her, that I gained about 10 pounds.

This is THREE TIMES the amount that my preggers books inform me is healthy. 0-3 pounds, really? Yes, maybe if I was throwing up every day, like many pregnant women in their 1st trimester. Me, I was hungry all the time, I was told I couldn’t continue my Insanity work outs (I miss you, Sean T.!), and I kept all my calories from coming back up. It was a recipe for weight gain.

I wasn’t a fan of gaining this much weight, but I wasn’t going to obsess over weight gain either. People, pregnant ladies have baby parts to make. We can’t be bothered with calorie counting.

I slept like a freakin’ baby(maker) during the 1st trimester too. I woke up in the morning feeling like I’d just gotten the best night’s sleep of my life, and that was often WITH a 2 am pee break to interrupt my REM cycle.

Things have changed in the 2nd trimester, I’ll admit. Mainly I’m more tired, which leads to lack of exercise, which leads to a harder time going to sleep at night, which leads to being more tired.

Darn you vicious cycle!

When you’re tired, you don’t feel healthy, and you’re more sensitive about little things, and let’s face it, the fact that you weigh the most you’ve ever weighed in your life (and it’s only going to get worse!) is a big “SUCK” too.

Where’s my violin? I’m throwing a little pity party over here.

Being pregnant has not been incredibly difficult thus far. I’m pretty much enjoying the whole journey. But I will say that it is a constant adjustment. Your body is no longer all your own. Add all the physical changes to the emotional toll of contemplating being responsible for another human being, and you have a recipe for one-to-two-to-three break downs.

I’m working on staving off my second pregnancy break down of this pregnancy. I think keeping it under 5 will be a reasonable goal.

I suppose it isn’t as much fun to read about as some of the other things I write about. Sorry. But you know what, I’m tired and I’m not going to apologize anymore! You are going to read it and LIKE it!

Oh dear.

I think Baby Dub must have known that I would have a weak constitution for even the mildest of discomforts in pregnancy. She’s been so easy on me so far. I’ve felt gross for the past 3 days, and I’m ready to snap. Can you even imagine what it would have been like if I’d been sick for days on end?

We would not be here today.

There would be no time for blogging in between trips to the bathroom, screaming fits at the Hubs about ice cream flavors, and sobbing sessions in the corner over all my parenting fears.

Thank you, Baby Dub, for being so kind to me.

I am gearing up for the most important job of my life, and while this particular job is totally terrifying, I choose to be awesome at my every undertaking.

It is time for me to be awesome at the 2nd trimester.

Three days of funk is enough funk for one pregnancy.

We’re a few weeks behind, but…

…let the HONEYMOON of pregnancy begin!

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